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Decades ago I made a pact with the Universe. Every horse who came under my “ownership” (stewardship) would have the best life I could provide and a new good home if that was what the future brought for them. I kept a lot of horses from birth to death, but many more horses and some mules moved along to loving homes for a plethora of reasons. My brother and I made a list in the ’90’s of the horses we had owned – after remembering the names of 300+ horses, we stopped counting…

That sounds like we were turning horses over “right and left”, but the reality was, I bought, trained and sold dozens. I ran three schools of horsemanship from 1973 to 1997 and continued to teach after that. Dozens of school horses worked with me. Sometimes, a better type of home was found for some. At times, a horse proved to be more suited to “family life”. I rescued horses from dire situations… I started my 4th school in 2010 here in Las Cruces and it morphed into this Sanctuary.

During all those years, I made some mistakes. One time, when I had to move to Arizona, I gave a horse I had raised to a lady I thought would be the perfect home… she could handle him, I knew that. He was complicated because he was orphaned at birth. They are never easy because they model after humans instead of other horses.

When I returned to New Mexico, I learned that this horse had been for sale, had not sold and was going to auction! Friends bought him to save him. He was difficult for them to handle, so I found a woman who I had worked with in the past who had known and loved him. They gave him to her, and it was a perfect match. He was safe.

We do the best we can. I learned that a horse sold for a lot of money would be “worth” more to the buyer than a horse given away, no matter the circumstances or the horse’s abilities. I learned that people’s lives can change and their priorities change. In the rescue world, we can adopt out lots of horses to make room for more intakes – but making sure the adopted horses continue to be cherished isn’t easy.

We all have contracts that stipulate an adopted horse is to be returned to us if it doesn’t work out. I am so grateful that our adopters have honored that. But many times, for friends of mine, it has not gone that way.

At Dharmahorse, we have so many senior and special needs horses. They stay with us for the rest of their lives. Of course, that means they die here. They are cherished and cared for – sometimes in heroic ways – through their last months, weeks, days… even hours. Crickey, it’s not easy. But I’ll tell you what is harder. It is much more painful to learn of a horse who had been in your care who was ridden into the ground, ignored, brutalized or left to suffer. No matter how you try to keep tabs on them, horses can fall into at-risk situations in the blink of an eye. So, these beloveds stay with us. They stay as long as the quality of their lives is good and their day-to-day existence is worth living. If a rescued horse had been dumped in the desert, starved, brutalized or injured, to put them at risk of falling into that same situation would be unconscionable!

Decisions are very much made “in the moment”. The passing of a resident (the last euthanasia’s here were horses aged 35, 42, 40 and 31) will make room for an equine who needs us. And intake is decided from a 2-page list of criteria… and a Board of Directors meeting, even if it has to be virtual.

Rescue/Sanctuary isn’t easy. Sometimes we are a “nursing home”; sometimes we’re hospice. Always, we are home for these horses.